"When we had our children, our ideas changed somewhat. Thenceforward we lived only for them; they made all our happiness and we would never have found it save in them. In fact, nothing any longer cost us anything; the world was no longer a burden to us. As for me, my children were my great compensation, so that I wished to have many in order to bring them up for Heaven" -- Saint Zelie Martin, mother of St. Therese of Lisieux, canonized October 18, 2015 along with her husband St. Louis Martin.

Saturday, April 16, 2016

Deep and Prayerful Thoughts on Homeschooling

Yesterday afternoon I was sitting in my living room with a dear friend and her truly lovely daughter while a whole bunch of grade-schoolers played capture the flag out on my front lawn.

Arwen was playing capture the flag because...she is a grade-schooler.  Yes, my mature and oldest 14-year-old daughter is still in 8th grade.  In about a month, that will no longer be the case.

The daughter of my friend sat comfortably in a chair as her Mom chatted with my sisters.  I noticed that the girl was happy to join in the conversation.  She was at ease, cheerful, and just a nice addition to the group of us (5) ladies in general.

I had been waiting for this moment, and I asked: "What are your plans for next year?"

This girl is 18 and graduating from high school this May.

"I'm going to Franciscan!"  She said with a big smile.

I just had to ask her about the application process.

I went to a college prep high school with a woman whose full-time job it was to help the students stay on top of application deadlines and to proof our entrance essays.  The school brought in representatives from colleges all throughout our Junior and Senior years.  We even had a class on "Tools for Success".   I cannot describe how seriously our college application process was taken or the incredible joy and relief I felt at being accepted at any college, much less the college of my choice.

What had this home schooled young woman done?

She had filled out transcripts and taken the ACT and done well.  She landed herself an academic scholarship to boot.  There hadn't even been a fee to apply!

No, she wasn't going to Harvard.  She was going to a faithful-to-the-Magisterium Catholic college where she might pursue a degree in mathematics.  She could get a degree in teaching or nursing and come away with a career (or at least the beginning of one) in four years.

Is it really that easy?

Was she isolated and depressed after her four years "at home"?  Nope.  She was a smiling little beam of sunshine who laughed as her mom expressed their mutual astonishment of how much MORE social they were once they decided to leave the school system and home school.

They laughed again as they admitted that there was a good deal of driving involved in being so social.  But it didn't seem to be a source of hardship.  They really just seemed to be so--happy--about it all.

Our afternoon was cut short (it was over an hour long visit) when the college-bound teen had to get to her afternoon work on time (she is a checker at a grocery store near their home).  The younger siblings were corralled into the family van and they were off.

----

Today Arwen is doing placement testing for a Catholic Great Books High School that is opening near our home.  She is excited about the challenge of "going to school" with diverse teachers and students.  Every child has their own educational, social and developmental needs for their flourishing.  I dearly desire the flourishing and happiness of my children.  I watch carefully to see how they are growing and what might "be good" for them.  I cannot provide everything.  Some gifts only God can give.  I can offer what I am able to in terms of opportunities or environments.

Right now I am praying very hard that God grant me the wisdom to know where Arwen will be happiest, where she might best flourish during her high school years.  It is a decision we will make together, with her father.  Many details still need to unfold.

As a final note:

I have tried over and again to write a bit on this (for me) huge decision.  Every family, every child, is so different that it's hard to share on the internet without desiring to go on and on about all of the details and nuances that come to play in these particular circumstances.  Some might wonder why I'm even considering one option or another.  Many people are simply prejudiced for or against one option or another.  When I write for an unknown and world-wide audience I am tempted to answer all of the objections I anticipate.  I really can't do that: this post is already too long.  In the end, this will be a prudential judgement that we make for Arwen alone (not for all 9 of our children at once).  It is also a decision that can be reversed or changed.  Whatever we choose, we will choose for the good, and if information is gained once the decision is made, we can change that decision.

I'll keep you all posted...we will have to make our decision by, well, the start of the next school year:).

You don't have too long to wait!:)








  

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