I'm just going to credit Kimberly Hahn right now for giving voice to what has become a very meaningful reality in my life as a stay-at-home, home educating mother: my home is my sanctuary.
The feminist movement loves to paint women as trapped in the cage of their house, a slave to the man whom they call "dear" and the children they begrudgingly bear. Well, things have changed a lot and I think we'd have to look pretty far to a) find a man who really wanted that many children anyway or b) didn't pressure his wife to find a way to supplement the family's income. I think that the feminist movement is basically out-dated on many fronts and really doesn't speak to the reality of the modern woman. In my experience, chatting with the random woman pushing her child in the swing next to me at the park, I have found FAR more women who wish they had the luxury of staying at home with their children, at least while they were young. I didn't say some women don't choose to pursue a career, and I didn't say that women should be discriminated against in the workforce. I'm just saying, there are a lot of women out there who would love a) more children and b) to stay home with them, but c) those darn feminists have changed the dynamics of our society and economy so that the average mother feels she ought to work outside of the home (in order to justify her existence in society), and certainly that finances require that she do. This is sad, and it is especially demeaning to the importance, the work and vocation of wife and mother.
Women have a right to be fully supported in their work as wives and mothers. We need to have full confidence to embrace our vocation and live it out as we best see fit, without letting washed-up feminist ideologues make us feel inadequate or insecure about our choices.
So, go ahead then. Make your home your sanctuary. Make it a place that you love to be. Make it your haven and let your entire family flourish from the work of your hands. You want to heal from post-partum depression? Let me tell you: a warm, home-cooked dinner that is gobbled up by a thankful husband and children does a wealth of good to a sore heart. Why? Because they think you are awesome, amazing, and wonderful. They might not verbalize their thanks on a daily basis (unless you bring out ice cream for dessert and they actually start cheering, I mean, a girl needs her perks, I'm just saying you could try it), but they'll notice. Plus, when you know that you did a good job, it melts away feelings of inadequacy and self-deprication. You can see that clean kitchen and pile of folded laundry and feel that you are worth something. Depression is a bunch of lies. You are loved by your family and they need you. It helps when you show yourself something you've done that even you have to appreciate. Even just one little corner of a room at a time. Just dust that mantle and light that candle. I bet you'll go on from there.
My advice today is: be a mom. Whether or not you work, be a homemaker.
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